A ==> Confused person
B ==> Prefer to have sex before marriage
C ==> Knows everything and disscuss everything broadly.
A: Friends, I am very much confused. Should I go for sex before marriage or not? Tell me some solution. If not, Why so and if so why should I go for it?
B: Oho, This is a very genuine problem with guys. According to me I think we should get involved in pre marriage sex. We are free to do so but after marriage we should limit ourselves to our wife. And no more relationship with past girl friend.
C: How could you say that? How could you expect that if one is involved in sex before marraige wont get involved after marriage. Sex is very addictive. I think we shouldnt at all do sex before marriage.
A: Bro, Dont you think B is right. What is harm in being involving yourself in sex before marriage. Afterall we are not cheating on our wives. We will be loyal after marriage. The only thing is that we shouldnt tell anything to her about our past relationship.
C: Should I laugh? Dont you think, this is cheating?Loyallity means we should share each and everything with her. If you dont tell her about your past relationship. It implies that you did something wrong and you are hiding something from here.
B: Hey man,! You are over reacting. What do you mean? We shouldnt sex??. Oh cumon. This is 2006.Grow up man. Ok, I will tell her everything to my wife and will also aplomb her that I wont do it again. Is it comfortable with you?
C: No its not. Just put yourself in place of her and then think over all these situation. Like She is telling you about her relationship with here past friend.And that friend still comes to your house. How would you feel? Wont you suspect your wife? Won't you spy on your wife? Would you be able to live quietly knowing the fact that she is not virgin. Of course not.
A: Cummon. If we are not virgin, we shouldnt expect our wife to be virgin. So its ok, with me. Yeah! But she shouln't continue here relationship with here past BF's. That is something bothers me.
B: I am with you A.
C: Dont tell me. Lets take it other way round. If you wife thinks exactly like me who thinks that if I am virgin I expect my lover to be virgin too.
B: See you are dumb. You know a famous proverb " VIRGINITY ISNOT DIGNITY, Its a lack of OPPURTUNITY".
A: I exactly thinks the same.
C: That is not something very true. There are still few peoples who thinks that we should be loyal to your wife and shouldnt involve in sex before marriage. Even if they get chance to do sex, they just ignore it.
A: Hahah, who could ignore sex? If girl is openly seduding any guy a guy will never stop doing that because he know he has no harm in doing it.
B: Yes ofcourse. We dont have control on our sex harmone. Sometime everything seems to be sex driven.
C: You are wrong. Everything is not sex driven. Lets disscuss about the previous topic rather then this sex. Listen to my point then you ask question if you have.
See there are two kinds of people who thinks sex is eveything and relationship is secondary thing. The another kind of people are those who thinks relationship is the ultimate aim and sex is just a way to get close to someone you love.
Now if you have a lover. Ofcourse I am assuming that you are not going to prostitute. Now see what is the process. sex instinct is in both of us (boy ang girl). Both are equally interested in having sex. Even if you go by biology girls are less interested but once they get the instinct you cant stop them. Boys are aggressive by nature and always need to take the first step in this regard. If girls give the postive reponse you flow with it or you stop at the moment because aggressiveness may result with nothing. So guys always do everything cooly.
Now there are two cases either you get involved in sex and other is you give a break to your sex instinct.
Lets take the first case that is you get involved in sex with your lover before marriage:
First thing, you need to persuade her for having sex or she is a sex maniac and offers you to have sex. In any case you will have sex. Now suppose you did it atleast once before marriage. But believe girl wont be interested untill and unless she is sure that you are gonna marry her.
There are 50% chances that you are not going to marry that girl. Here we have two cases either you marry that girl or not. Lets take the case when you marry that girl.
If you marry that girl then it means that there is nothing gonna happen in future world. You love is successful and you are a great person.
Now if you didnt what are consequences:
Depending on your wife principle your life style will vary. Here we have two cases. Either your life partner is virgin or not.
If she is not virgin then if you tell her that you loved another girl before and had sex. She wont mind as she knows she is belong to same category. So here may be there might be some conflict she will manage with you.
If she is virgin, then she ofcourse expect you to be virgin. So this will bitter the relationship. May be she is broadminded girl and managed with you. But she will always have a point to curse you. Now by chance you feel that your wife couldnt satisfy you as your previous lover (as you had already tasted what sex is).So you start to move towards other girl to satisfy yourself because you know what really sex is and sex experience differs from persons to persons. So your life will be hell.
If you hadnt done that mistake then you would have taken it granted that "OHO..sex is nothing it is just a matter of few hours of enjoyment and everything is relationship". But as you have already experienced it you will try some more.wife
So in this case chances of life to be happy are when :
1) Both are not virgin and both are loyal .Tell you about every past relatioship. And promise to not to repeat it again
2) Your life partner is virgin and broadminded and satifies you fully.
If you calculate : The probablity of leading a good life in "SEX before Marraige" is 4/13.
4 –> Cases Lead to happy
13 –> Total Number of cases.
Lets take the other case that is you didn't get involved in sex with your lover before marriage:
There are some advantage as well as disadvantages too :
Advantages:
–> She/he will start to believe in you rather than your sexy/handsome body.She/he will come to know the importance of sex in life and consider it sacred. So will start truly believing in proper relationship.
–> She/he will come to know about the commitment you make for your better future in terms of relationship. And it will help in buliding up a pure relationship. And who really doesnt want a "Sati Savitri" type wife and "majnu" type husbanc who didnt even hiccupps to die for his lover.
Disadvantage:
–> May be your lover is very aggressive and believe that doing sex is not bad thing. May be when you resist more, it will hamper your relationship. But I wont call it true love if you get ready to have sex to prove your love for him/her.
–> We are humans. Sex harmones releases daily. So it might lead to a little bit frustration in life if you dont make love.
–> You will be the odd one out among you friends who does nothing but sex with their lovers. May be sometime you will feel low for this also.
Now lets get to the main point.
There are two cases either you get chance to have sex or not.
We have already disscussed what if we chooses to have sex. Now let us disscuss what if we choose to not to have sex.
Now if you get married to the girl whom you denied to have sex before then she will know your importance and will always respect you like anything. She will never try to break your faith and will LOVE you forever. She will never go for extra marital affairs as she know importance of sex in your life. So you will live happily.
Second case when you didnt marry the same girl. There are two option either you marry a virgin or not virgin.
If you partner is not virgin. Then you will be hurted the most. May be it will lead to a bitter relationship but everything will be in your hand. You can either choose to live happily by managing with you partner and tell him/her to not to do it again or you will leave her.
If you partner is virgin there is nothing best possible then this relationship. You are the best ad happy couple of the universe.
Overall if we calculate you will be happy in all cases except in the case when your partner is not loyal even after marraige.
Thats all i wanted to say
A: Oh great everything seems to be crystal clean in my mind. We will be happy if you dont have sex before marraige except some bearable nonsense by society.
B: Yaar I am still not satisfied. What if we didnt tell him/her about past relationship and there is no source that she/he will ever come to know about that mistake?
C: haha.. you itself called it "MISTAKE" and you are still trying to justify it. Thats not good. Yeah it is quite right your partner will be happy but would you be happy? I mean will you be able to justify yourself. You will be fallen in your own eyes and will never be able to have eye contact with your partner. So why to take load of this situation.
See take my advice,
THINK BRAODLY, maintain relationship. Believe in yourself and prepare for betterment of the future. These short term happiness cost you nothing but pain in future.
"EVERY RELATIONSHIP HOLDS GOOD, IF IT IS RESPECTED"
Feel free to comment.
PICTORIAL EXPLANATION OF THE WHOLE DISCUSSION
[Next article will be ==> Does love exist or it is just sex??]
What to choose if we have only two options parents and lover?